"Agent to the Stars" by John Scalzi

---

Agent to the Stars
John Scalzi
368 pp. Tor. $14.95
Pub. Date: 10/28/2008
ISBN-13: 978-0765317711

Reviewed by Paul Stotts

---

“I have a client. It’s a very important client, Tom, probably the most important client we as an agency will ever have. At least I can’t imagine any other client being more important than this one. This client feels that he has a very serious image problem, and I’d have to say that I agree with him there. He has a special project that he wants to put together, something that needs the most delicate handling imaginable.” – Carl Lupo “Agent to the Stars”

There is a certain level of comedic brilliance in the idea of a Hollywood agent helping an alien race with an image problem before the aliens can make a (hopefully peaceful) first contact with humanity. Considering Hollywood is almost wholly responsible for demonizing extraterrestrials (minus Steven Spielberg), an alien race using the star-making system for their benefit seems only fair. If image is everything, than who understands this better than Hollywood, a town which is all about style over substance. So with such a clever concept it’s no surprise that John Scalzi’s excellent “practice novel” “Agent to the Stars” is much more fun and enjoyable than most writer’s real novels. Not to mention, the book is absolutely hilarious. “Agent to the Stars” is one of those rare novels in which if you don’t laugh at least once while reading it, your spouse has likely collected your life insurance.

Now funny and John Scalzi novels are essentially synonymous. He must bathe in big buckets of funny, because the man is seemingly a giant repository of quips and one-liners. Contrasted with the Old Man’s War novels which have a dark, gallows-type of humor, the light and satiric comedy in “Agent to the Stars” is more in line with Scalzi’s chapter-long-fart-joke extravaganza “The Android’s Dream.” It’s a novel you read for fun, a completely disposable pleasure, television for the mind. In fact, reading “Agent to the Stars” was like the literary equivalent of watching an incredibly funny T.V. sitcom, some character-driven piece with witty dialogue and awkward moments that’s played exclusively for laughs. And you get all this without the absolutely annoying laugh-track. (And really, who need’s to be told when to laugh. Except for the humorless.)

Up and coming Hollywood agent Thomas Stein just closed an extremely lucrative deal for one of his clients, the young starlet Michelle Beck. Tom, unfortunately, doesn’t get a chance to celebrate the biggest deal he’s ever closed before he’s called into the office of his boss, Carl Lupo.

Carl’s really impressed with Tom’s abilities and believes Tom has a bright future ahead of him in the movie business. Carl also knows that Tom has a lot of disposable clients, other than Michelle, who he can pawn off on junior agents. The ability to easily reduce Tom’s client list fits with Carl’s plans. Carl has an important client that’s going to require a tremendous amount of attention, and he believes Tom is the man for the job once his client list has been cleared. After Tom agrees to boot his existing clients and take on this new assignment, he’s introduced to his new client, an alien named Joshua. Stunned, Tom discovers that only he and Carl are aware of Joshua’s existence. It seems that Joshua is a member of the Yherajk race, which look like blobs of Jell-O and communicate with each other by releasing various scents. Hideous scents, in fact. As Joshua happily admits to Tom a Yherajk get together is “like a convention of farts.” (It wouldn’t be John Scalzi novel if the story didn’t have at least one fart reference.)

Joshua has come to Earth in order to begin preparations for the Yherajk’s first contact with humans. Tom discovers that a Yherajk spacecraft is already orbiting the planet, just waiting for the right time to make their presence known. But the Yherajk realize they have an image problem. Unlike E.T., hideous smelling blob-like aliens don’t give people a warm and fuzzy feeling. Therefore Joshua concludes, why not hire the biggest Hollywood agency to fix the Yherajk’s image problem. So it’s up to one of Hollywood’s hottest agents Thomas Stein to help Joshua and the Yherajk improve their appeal, while keeping their existence quiet at the same time. But that’s a secret that’s becoming increasingly harder to keep when a tabloid reporter Jim Van Doren begins nosing around Tom.

Scalzi’s greatest strength as a writer has always been his ability to write witty, hip dialogue, and “Agent to the Stars” is no exception. Scalzi’s dialogue here features an abundance of popular culture references that are absolutely loaded with sarcasm. At its heart, “Agent to the Stars” is a very entertaining and amusing satire of popular culture. It takes our communal cultural language and looks at it differently, often revealing a new truth within. This is clearly evident when Joshua states:

“Until I actually got down here, we were under the impression ‘groovy’ was still current. It’s all those Brady Bunch reruns. Stupid Nick at Night. For the longest time it never really occurred to us that they weren’t live broadcasts. We thought that the repetition had some ritual significance. Like they were religious texts or something.”

What is deliciously ironic about this quote is that television has become a religion for many. It has ritual significance as well as cultural significance, since television disseminates our culture (along with the Internet) to a huge majority of the populace. So thinking that television can be used to improve the image of an unattractive alien race is not far-fetched. Rather it’s utterly logical. Society is controlled by popular images. There is no other way to explain that at one point in the past the Brady Bunch may have seemed cool, while now it’s just viewed as dated. Scalzi is using our knowledge of popular culture in order to mock the significance we place on it. And he’s effective in doing it, and it’s what makes “Agent to the Stars” so vastly enjoyable.

One of my biggest complaints about “Agent to the Stars” (and this applies to all of Scalzi’s work so far) is that his characters aren’t as distinctive to me as they could be. This arises from the fact that most of Scalzi’s characters talk the same, filled with a quick wit and snappy comebacks. Part of the problem with writing great satiric dialogue brimming with popular culture references is that all the characters start to communicate through this new reference speak, and it starts to become unrealistic. There just isn’t enough difference in the dialogue of the characters; every character is a bright little snowflake armed with a plethora of quips. It leads me to believe this is Scalzi’s singular voice rather than the distinct voices of his characters.

Last Word:
“Agent to the Stars” is an incredibly fast-paced, character-driven story that will have you laughing all your small bits off. The satire is sharp, observant and very well done. The majority of scenes are played for comedy and not for action, so if you’re looking for a science fiction story that is more action-oriented, you’d be better off reading Scalzi’s excellent Old Man War series. If you are in the mood though for a humorous sci-fi romp, “Agent to the Stars” is highly recommended.

Final Grade: 80 out of 100